Thursday, November 30, 2006

Shamu Gone Wild

Well, Shamu threw a nutty and attacked his trainer. Which brings up an interesting point: why is this "news?" I mean, they are called KILLER whales, after all.

Some highlights:
"Some mornings they just wake up not as willing to do the show as others,"

This clearly falls under the "NO SHIT SHERLOCK" category.

The whale, Kasatka, was back in the water Thursday for a lunchtime performance that went off without a hitch.
What, no suspension? Maybe Terrell Owens should have bit Donovan McNabb in the ankle last year. What's one more injury for McNabb?


Meanwhile, experts from other SeaWorld parks and marine centers converged in San Diego to review Wednesday's incident and figure out what set the whale off.
See above. How would you like to be the trainer for the lunchtime show? "I'm sure everything will be fine. We're just going to fly all the best experts in the country to find out what happened. Please have your next-of-kin report anything to us that might be useful."

The act called for the orca to leap out of the water so Peters could dive off her nose.
Oh, Steve Irwin...sadly you have died in vain. Apparently we haven't learned the lesson yet.

Kasatka and Peters were involved in a scrape in 1999, when the whale tried to bite the trainer during a show, Scarpuzzi said.
So, it's kinda like Britney and K-Fed?

But in captivity, "they're dangerous because they're big and sometimes they're not happy with their situation."
Again, please file under "NO SHIT SHERLOCK."

Kasatka made headlines in 2001 when she became the first killer whale to successfully give birth in captivity after being artificially inseminated.
When Francis Bacon invented the scientific method, is this what he had in mind?

Oh well, so long and thanks for all the fish!